So much to say - By Windy

11 replies [Last post]
hotair1's picture
Offline
Joined: 2009-03-12

This is an actual blog post by Windy -- after reading it, it broke my heart.  Over the past few years i have had more drama in my life than i ever
imagined. Finally i thought things were coming to a close, at-least
until the next chapter in my life, but again as we all are in
predicting our lives, I was wrong. Thats ok for me because i understand
things happen and the best way to deal with them is to know how you
feel about the situation, and dissolve it, whether that means confront
it, or just pull yourself from it all together. There are few occasions
in a persons life when you feel such hatred, or disloyalties about a
situation that the best and (yes) adult action to take is to remove
yourself from it all together. There have been a few situations that I
have done this with the past few years.

Everyone knows this, but alas there always seems to be a few people who
try and force you to stay in these situations. Would you call these
people friends? Would you raise your beer and cheer with the person who
calls you or your significant other a "f***ing bastard", because they
don't like your feelings about something that has absolutely nothing to
do with their life. You would think that a friendship re-alignment was
in order, for that kind of dis-respect. If a child came up to you and
asked you, "May i have some food, i haven't eaten", would you tell him,
"No, tell you parents to feed you". Well what if that child has no
parents? What if that child lives under a bridge somewhere? What if
that child has parents who abuse him and force this child to use drugs.
While most of you say, "Ah, thats a bit extreme", I worked in a
behavior facility for children, and it happens daily. What about that
child's story. What about his feelings?

And what about deliberate acts. If you knew that i didn't like ice
cream, would you invite me to get ice cream with you? Of course not,
because you are respectable to the person you care for as a friend.
When you care about someone you know that your decisions aren't self
decisions anymore. What you do in your everyday life affects someone
else. Every decision you make. Getting your tires fixed just helped the
mechanic needing a pay check. Paying your car payment before going on
vacation just helped your child get to daycare. Why is it so hard for
people to think of others when they make those decisions. "Well if i
buy what i want, am i going to be able to pay for my childs shoes"
instead of "Well ill buy what i want AND buy the other", but you are
forgetting that the car needs paid too

I guess the main point I get frustrated about in this world are people
who believe their situation applies to everyone. So called "friends"
who think their way is right for you, or protesters who think their
beliefs should fall into your daily to-do list. I guess everyone is
selfish. Everyone feels what they think to be true in their life, is
the best and right way for everyone else to live it. There are a lot of
situations in this life, that i truly feel would ruin the best aspects
of my life, and i choose to stay away from them because of that. Drugs,
Ex-Gfs, etc. Now i am definitely not erasing the things from my past
that i have done, because they make me who i am, but does that mean i
should let them be reintroduced into my life by friends or other
situations..If i had ever been a drug addict (which i have never
touched), is it ok when Im sober to be around it again? Is it ok to
remember the feelings i had for it, when it felt so good. What if my
current situation gets hard, is it ok to be vulnerable to temptation
from old feelings. Now lets flip that to the latter...Is it ok to be
around an ex who at one point in my life i loved...with all my
heart...when i have someone else at home, even if i had nothing to do
with her being there. Is it ok for me to be sitting across the room
from her, remembering how great it was when i see her eyes, how she
felt, her smell, even though the end was bad. What about that song i
wrote for her, is it ok for me to sing it in my mind, or remember the
time i first sang it to her? Again, is it ok for me to be vulnerable to
those old feelings, when my current situation is a little rocky,
regardless of my intentions? Those feelings are there, and they will
always be. There's no denying that. We cannot forget them and act like
we are now just friends. Once you have loved someone, thats what you
remember of them. Not the friendship you had previously. It's like a
cancer. It's always there, but your actions in life predict whether or
not it rears its ugly head. And the funny part is, even if it was a
horrible end, you just don't remember that part. After that time has
gone by, you start to see why you fell for them the first time. The
feelings come back. Feelings are temptation and just like a married
couple for 50 years, they come and they go. Love, like addiction is a
fickle thing and the person you thought you were totally over, can all
of a sudden become the twinkle in your eye again, even if you love
someone else, if you put yourself in that situation. Love is work,
thats why couples hate each other one minute and love the next. Noone
is "supposed" to be with anyone. You can fall in love with anyone who
peaks your interest if the time and situation is right. But real love
is knowing your limits, knowing your partner, respecting them, and
doing everything in your power to rid yourself of situations, that make
you or them uncomfortable. After all, love is what matters...not how
much fun you can have on a single day.....

We all have these people telling us, "You should accept it, and forgive
them, after all I did" Did you? Well God Damn I am glad that you did,
hell that makes everything better, doesn't it? But maybe it didn't
affect you like it did myself or my family. Maybe, just maybe it really
hurt me...Somewhere in life there is a force that keeps people from
doing anything, that reminds loved ones of the things that hurt them. I
believe it's called appreciation...And who's really being the adult
here? When a person has priorities and makes them the focus of their
life, or the one who thinks their early life priorities of doing what
they want, matter to someone who lives a different life, a life for
their family. We all are selfish and feel like our situation and advice
is right to everyone, but if any advice i've ever received means more
than anything right now its this: Unless I ask for it, leave your's at
home, because I know what's best for me and my family.

BerkshireBull's picture
Offline
Joined: 2009-06-10

DON'T DO IT WIND.  DO NOT CHEAT ON YOUR WIFE WITH YOUR EX.  YOU HAVE A CHILD TOGETHER FOR F-SAKE. 

Moraen's picture
Offline
Joined: 2009-01-22

Gay

voltmoie's picture
Offline
Joined: 2008-11-05

That was perhaps the hardest read of my life.  I'm a bit over Wind, he's sorta like that crap I took last night.  It hurt, burned a bit, stunk up my bathroom but now I'm working on the next one.

Spaceman Spiff's picture
Offline
Joined: 2006-08-08

I hope you didn't type that whole thing. 

hotair1's picture
Offline
Joined: 2009-03-12

Spaceman Spiff wrote:I hope you didn't type that whole thing.  Pull right off his facebook page  http://www.facebook.com/wind3574check out his "music" section, a big fan of MJ it appears

Hey Kool-Aid's picture
Offline
Joined: 2008-03-30

LOL...boy...alot of lessons to be learned from all of this!  1st & foremost...don't be a d***  2nd (and possibly most important)...don't use your real name...and don't use the same screen name on every blog/website/thread!   Priceless

Popeye $'s picture
Offline
Joined: 2009-06-30

Moraen wrote:GayI'll second that. Now all we need is the resident authority on all things queer LA Polesmoker to confirm his approval of Windy being a little light in the loafers.

Still@jones's picture
Offline
Joined: 2009-03-22

hotair1 wrote:
Pull right off his facebook page  http://www.facebook.com/wind3574check out his "music" section, a big fan of MJ it appearsIs that a picture of him???I thought Windy was a 55 year old black woman. my bad...

Jebediah's picture
Offline
Joined: 2009-07-10

hotair is hot for windy.  gay man love.  hmmmm

Segment5Dude's picture
Offline
Joined: 2009-08-12

hotair1 wrote:This is an actual blog post by Windy -- after reading it, it broke my heart.  Over the past few years i have had more drama in my life than i ever imagined. Finally i thought things were coming to a close, at-least until the next chapter in my life, but again as we all are in predicting our lives, I was wrong. Thats ok for me because i understand things happen and the best way to deal with them is to know how you feel about the situation, and dissolve it, whether that means confront it, or just pull yourself from it all together. There are few occasions in a persons life when you feel such hatred, or disloyalties about a situation that the best and (yes) adult action to take is to remove yourself from it all together. There have been a few situations that I have done this with the past few years. Everyone knows this, but alas there always seems to be a few people who try and force you to stay in these situations. Would you call these people friends? Would you raise your beer and cheer with the person who calls you or your significant other a "f***ing bastard", because they don't like your feelings about something that has absolutely nothing to do with their life. You would think that a friendship re-alignment was in order, for that kind of dis-respect. If a child came up to you and asked you, "May i have some food, i haven't eaten", would you tell him, "No, tell you parents to feed you". Well what if that child has no parents? What if that child lives under a bridge somewhere? What if that child has parents who abuse him and force this child to use drugs. While most of you say, "Ah, thats a bit extreme", I worked in a behavior facility for children, and it happens daily. What about that child's story. What about his feelings?And what about deliberate acts. If you knew that i didn't like ice cream, would you invite me to get ice cream with you? Of course not, because you are respectable to the person you care for as a friend. When you care about someone you know that your decisions aren't self decisions anymore. What you do in your everyday life affects someone else. Every decision you make. Getting your tires fixed just helped the mechanic needing a pay check. Paying your car payment before going on vacation just helped your child get to daycare. Why is it so hard for people to think of others when they make those decisions. "Well if i buy what i want, am i going to be able to pay for my childs shoes" instead of "Well ill buy what i want AND buy the other", but you are forgetting that the car needs paid tooI guess the main point I get frustrated about in this world are people who believe their situation applies to everyone. So called "friends" who think their way is right for you, or protesters who think their beliefs should fall into your daily to-do list. I guess everyone is selfish. Everyone feels what they think to be true in their life, is the best and right way for everyone else to live it. There are a lot of situations in this life, that i truly feel would ruin the best aspects of my life, and i choose to stay away from them because of that. Drugs, Ex-Gfs, etc. Now i am definitely not erasing the things from my past that i have done, because they make me who i am, but does that mean i should let them be reintroduced into my life by friends or other situations..If i had ever been a drug addict (which i have never touched), is it ok when Im sober to be around it again? Is it ok to remember the feelings i had for it, when it felt so good. What if my current situation gets hard, is it ok to be vulnerable to temptation from old feelings. Now lets flip that to the latter...Is it ok to be around an ex who at one point in my life i loved...with all my heart...when i have someone else at home, even if i had nothing to do with her being there. Is it ok for me to be sitting across the room from her, remembering how great it was when i see her eyes, how she felt, her smell, even though the end was bad. What about that song i wrote for her, is it ok for me to sing it in my mind, or remember the time i first sang it to her? Again, is it ok for me to be vulnerable to those old feelings, when my current situation is a little rocky, regardless of my intentions? Those feelings are there, and they will always be. There's no denying that. We cannot forget them and act like we are now just friends. Once you have loved someone, thats what you remember of them. Not the friendship you had previously. It's like a cancer. It's always there, but your actions in life predict whether or not it rears its ugly head. And the funny part is, even if it was a horrible end, you just don't remember that part. After that time has gone by, you start to see why you fell for them the first time. The feelings come back. Feelings are temptation and just like a married couple for 50 years, they come and they go. Love, like addiction is a fickle thing and the person you thought you were totally over, can all of a sudden become the twinkle in your eye again, even if you love someone else, if you put yourself in that situation. Love is work, thats why couples hate each other one minute and love the next. Noone is "supposed" to be with anyone. You can fall in love with anyone who peaks your interest if the time and situation is right. But real love is knowing your limits, knowing your partner, respecting them, and doing everything in your power to rid yourself of situations, that make you or them uncomfortable. After all, love is what matters...not how much fun you can have on a single day..... We all have these people telling us, "You should accept it, and forgive them, after all I did" Did you? Well God Damn I am glad that you did, hell that makes everything better, doesn't it? But maybe it didn't affect you like it did myself or my family. Maybe, just maybe it really hurt me...Somewhere in life there is a force that keeps people from doing anything, that reminds loved ones of the things that hurt them. I believe it's called appreciation...And who's really being the adult here? When a person has priorities and makes them the focus of their life, or the one who thinks their early life priorities of doing what they want, matter to someone who lives a different life, a life for their family. We all are selfish and feel like our situation and advice is right to everyone, but if any advice i've ever received means more than anything right now its this: Unless I ask for it, leave your's at home, because I know what's best for me and my family.
 
All this over a RR forum. WTF

wittking9's picture
Offline
Joined: 2009-02-01

WTF I can't believe I just wasted my time reading this...I'm gonna go doorknock

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